Onefin's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Le Voyage]

Review for review just for Azhthar

Right off the bat, the sounds were pristine. Concertina thing, yes. Piano, yes. Bass thingy, yes. Glock thing, yes. Strings, fun. As you can tell, I am not completely professional in my instrumentation knowledge. Bear with me.

Melodies. I can't say they're really really good, but they're not bad! They're not extremely catchy, but it does reflect the mood pretty well. Well, might as well talk about the atmosphere now that I've mentioned it. The right combination of instruments, dynamics, style, and melodic content bring out something I wouldn't call dreamy, but more of a delicate, light style. I like it.

The last thing I will commend you for is the ending. I liked the way you ended it, it seriously promotes the theme of the whole thing and gives your song a nice finishing touch! Bravo!

Now, complaints. After the first minute I was getting seriously bored. In my mind, I was thinking, "Is anything going to happen?" Finally, at 1:15, you gave me the entrance of a glock, followed shortly by strings. But even then, nothing really happens. The only real change occurs at 02:51, where a suspended cymbal just barely does its job into a bigger section.

Well, I mentioned it, let's talk about that transition. The suspended cymbal does no good. It's a combination of two things. One, the cymbal roll itself was not nearly loud enough. Two, that cymbal had rolled before, and it brought up nothing, leading the listener (me) to think that if it happens again, it will also lead to nothing.

Overall, this is a solid piece! The melodies and the instruments work together to create a beautiful mood fitting of the name "Le Voyage". But despite all that, the song quickly becomes a bit boring; some more dynamic changes would help with that. Good work! 5/5, 9/10

Azhthar responds:

Hey! Thanks for the review! Actually if I read it it´s quite critically (which is good) and I was surprised that you gave it such a high rating afterwards. So... For the variations I was trying something different here. What I usually do with my tracks is to develop them all the time. This is another extreme and might be a problem because there is nothing that sticks to the listener afterwards. So I tried to be a bit more minimalistic here and it ended in some repetition... For the transitions: I had a completely different percussion part in my first version. It was more experimental and had much more variations but actually I didn´t like it at all, because it didn´t fit into the mood of the piece. Anyway... Thanks again for the review! It´s much better to get some critics instead of just praising because it helps for the next piece. Keep it up and thanks for taking your time to listen.

[Xtrullor - Earthsplitter]

That screenshot tho.... you did all that and didn't mess with the tempo? How could you resist the urge to mess with the BPM after all that?

Good work m8 that's intense!

[Be gay in the manliest way (TBAP REMASTER)]

I swear this is a Geometry Dash song...

This does fix a lot of issue :) it's way louder and more awesomer! but you messed up the ending. :(

TheBetterAudioPortal responds:

No I didn't.

[Be Gay in the Manliest Way]

As much as I am opposed to the title, I'll do R4R

DnB songs, for me, are all about the beat. What's a DnB song without good drums? And I can't fault you (or you guys? i can't tell if you're more than one person) much in that regard. The drums provide a solid beat which keeps the piece driving! Although I would have liked them a bit louder.

This track isn't without character! Through the sounds, the transitions, and everything in between, this track puts out a distinct personality. I like it!

The pluck at 0:48 is really cool! From there, the sounds you introduce are also pretty cool! Overall, the breakdown section and the stuff coming directly after it is really nice! Your bigger moments, however, could use a bit more. I felt the little "drop" part at 0:32 could have used some bigger sounds not only do differentiate it from the part before it, but to make it less underwhelming overall. If you had made your crash louder, layered something else onto the plucked arp riff, and used a bigger, fuller sound for that lead riff, it might have stood out more. A similar thing happens near the mid-end portion.

Hm... that's pretty much all I have to say. The track is great, but it needs some more awesomeness in certain places. That would make it stand out more, in my opinion. 5/5, 9/10

Noisysundae responds:

Blame TheBetterAudioPortal for making me call it like that. The original piece was titled "\Ur\Gay". :P

I'm one person but used the pronoun 'we' to give the atmosphere of an ice cream shop. The note about the drums volume is taken. Thanks.

If you want to do that. Lead synth in 0:48 is a simple triangle wave with a bit of square. All done in 3xOsc. Lowpass filter in the beginning makes it sound like a sine wave. Unfortunately, this was supposed to be a mock-up of the original for NGDIC2 contest so I can't change the composition that much. (Actually, I can change it since this isn't my submission for that anymore but I was already tired from my exam week. :( ) The lead in 1:30...ummm...it was louder before mastering and I decided to cut it down. I will consider making it a bit more dominant next time.

Thank you very much for the details. :)

[Cloud 9]

R4R stuff.

First off, things I liked:

Sound design is good in that it doesn't sound like a 2008s song.
Melodic ideas aren't bad, especially the riff at 0:28.
You have a good sense of bass. I heard a lot of low end, something a lot of songs lack.

Next, things I feel could have been better:

Your song is pretty quiet. For something like this, I feel a bit more could have been achieved.
I felt the buildup at 1:00 was cool, but the part directly after it didn't do justice to all the tension built in that moment. This is partly because your sound is so quiet.
This song could have benefited from slightly better instrumentation. I felt some sounds in here didn't quite do the melodic ideas justice. For example, I felt the chord pluck sound in the beginning could have been shorter and more staccato
More interesting things could have happened in this song. The first thing that comes to mind is the use of stereo, in that there was none. Panning is a great way to give your sound more depth.
Ultimately the sound gets dull after a while. Even after the first listen, the sounds quickly become uninteresting. This is probably a combination of all of the factors above, plus the fact that you repeated the same thing a lot.

I guess there are some pointers for you. Keep composing!

Drewpy responds:

Thank you so much for your detailed response! I'll look out for these things the next time I make a song, and I appreciate this so much.

[Ersatz]

How did I not review this? Crap!

Well, here I am. Let me start off with the beginning and just how much the beginning impressed me right off the bat. That sound design is AWESOME! I love your choice of starting the track with all sine sounds. Not only does does it sound awesome, it gives your sound a unique breadth and atmosphere. Perfect. However, I do have to complain a bit - later on, at around 1:46, you start a build up. Here, there's a chord sound which I'm not a fan of. Its entrance sounds kinda cheesy, if you ask me. But most everything else was crafted so perfectly, it makes up for it.

Atmosphere. You rock! The spacey, dystopian image that the song creates is quite vivid (haha, Newgrounds is trying to auto correct me to "utopian" :/ ). I looked up Ersatz, and I found "artificial, inferior substitute". Not sure what that means, but alright.

Next, originality. You rock again! This track, being the experimental little track it is, has a lot of awesome ideas in it. A lot of interesting things happened, despite them maybe being a bit underwhelming. But you didn't stick with the norm! Good job!

Now, melodic ideas. And this is where the real complaints start. I like your melodic content, it's really cool! But the problem is, there's so much more that could have been achieved! This song could have had so much more depth and overall amazingness, but sadly all of that didn't happen.

I'm gonna say the same thing for your progression. The build around 2:00 had me waiting for the track to go somewhere, but nothing big happened. It just kinda died, if you ask me.

Overall, this track is really really cool! Some awesome ideas were presented here. Sadly, they may not have been executed in the best way possible, so a lot of possible development remains untouched. Regardless, this is a stunning entry! Great job! (Oh, and I can't say "good luck" anymore cuz it's already over :/ sry man) 5/5, 9/10, awesomeness!

[toxic steam]

Dude. You need more views. NOW.

DjDragonfire responds:

Thanks I am working on a few new songs with launchpad (what this song was made on) and FL Studios (what I just got) thank you so much for supporting me! :)

[Electronic World]

Alright, since this song is at the top of the Techno charts for this year, I'm going to slap some criticism on here.

So first off, your song doesn't exactly sound full. This is a combination of a few things. First, your synths sound really old. This is 2015, but your main synth sounds like a 2006 kind of sound. Secondly, you don't have much going. In the "drop" part, all I hear is the main melody, a bassline, a kick and a snare. That's it. There are lots of ways you can achieve a fuller sound. Try layering more. Try plucked chords. Try some hi-hats. Try an arp or a sub bass. This is the biggest thing I see making your track empty. The third thing I notice is that it isn't very loud to begin with. If you use a weak synth like the one you have here as a lead, it won't give the impact you desire. Use something bigger, or make it bigger.

Overall your song is also pretty repetitive. There are some varied riffs here and there, but it's not much to fill up the three minutes that the song spans. Nothing particularly interesting happens. No impact breaks, not much automation, and nothing that breaks the mold.

It doesn't help that your transitions are rather uneventful. The transition at 0:35 might as well have not even been a proper transition, because nothing happens. It just goes away, and bam, suddenly, there's the lead. It even changes key, which would be good if there was a proper transition to make it less unexpected. Something similar happens at 1:26.

It's also pretty unoriginal. Like I said, nothing here is very interesting. The beginning starts with a sort of Stereo Madness riff (which isn't compositionally original at all), which then goes into a section with a very generic sounding melody, followed by another similar section with another very generic melody. Nothing differentiates this track from anything other people have already made before you. Try something new. Maybe use some mixer effects or something.

My last word of advice is the ending. For one, you played the beginning riff, but every so often you bring back in the piano for a couple of beats. The problem is that it feels out of place and sudden. Maybe you could have executed that section in a more discrete way. And also, the piece just cuts. You didn't leave a little tail or anything. It doesn't make sense to end a song this way. Let it breathe.

Sorry if this review sounded really really mean. When I point out the faults in a song, it's not because I really hate the song. I spend the time to write these things out so that you can grow as a musician. It's really cool to hear praise for your work, but eventually, as you begin to get better, you realize that criticism and advice is what you actually need to continue getting better. Hope this helps! :D

4/10 stars, rated 3/5. Keep composing!

[~Champion of Destruction RMX~]

I'm not sure if it was intentional, but all your sounds are ducking under the kick when it hits. This is annoying, especially since the kick at some points hits multiple times in rapid succession, making everything seems soft for a moment and then come back up. I'd work on that. ;)

Otherwise nice track, although it's quite empty.

[joarZ - Vengeance]

For a fellow Geometry Dasher, I'll leave a review.

First off I want to say, this was a pleasant surprise! Normally I find songs written by Geometry Dash players to be rather empty and repetitive, with nothing interesting happening. This one, though, is a bit different. While it still may be repetitive, it isn't empty.

Your sound design isn't bad! You know what makes a lead big and strong, as demonstrated by your drops. You also make good use of filters on those sounds for buildup! You have good sweep up sounds, as well, something that a lot of Geometry Dash players lack in their compositions. Not to mention your plucks and pads, as well.

Transitions. Go, you. Your use of transitional elements is fantastic, making different parts of the piece come together as one track perfectly and seamlessly. As that is something I need serious work on, I commend you. Good job! :D

The main melody here is nice. It's really catchy! Hm, I guess that's all there is to say about it, since there only is one melody.

Let's talk about that. Repetition. One thing I feel you need to work on. Repeating the same thing over and over again doesn't cut it. When a song is repetitive, at least for me, I quickly lose interest in it. This is especially so for a song fitting for Geometry Dash, where hearing it over and over again can put it on my "Geometry Dash songs I hate" list due to sheer overuse. I would work on making your tracks with less of the same thing over and over again. Introduce some melodic variation. Do something interesting. I don't know.

Other complaints. You had a nice ending until you decided to put a 5-note pluck riff where it doesn't belong. I think your ending would have been nicer had you omitted that 5-note pluck riff.

Your drums could have used more oomph, especially the kick. Right now they're kind of buried in the mix, which gives your song less power and impact. Also it makes it really hard for me to determine whether or not you side-chained anything, because your kick is nearly inaudible.

I feel like your bassline could have been voiced better. Instead of going up from E to A, you could have gone down to make A -> C less of a jump. Also the high A stands out over all the other notes played by the bass. Your bass sound could also have been louder and more on top of the mix. Bass is important. ;)

I have a feeling you were trying to imitate EnV when you made this. Problem is, copying EnV's style doesn't make your work exactly original. There's nothing that speaks to me as this song being yours more than it being EnV's.

Overall, this is a solid track! You have a nice, catchy melody which sticks to the listener for a long time, and your sounds sound better than that of most Geometry Dash players. However, unoriginality and repetitiveness make your song rather uninteresting in the long run. That being said, I enjoyed your track a lot! 5/5, 9/10, hope this helps!

JoarZ responds:

Wow! Thanks for the long time you spent in writing this feedback!
And yes you're right that its quite repitive, and not as original as other tracks out there (probs mainroom house fault xD).
And a big thanks for the positive feedback also! :D